(100) Posts of Myrtle

Yes sir, this is the 100th Meat Is Myrtle post.

I never thought it would be so easy to write 100 blog posts of garbage, but it was super easy!
To celebrate 100 Posts of Myrtle, I think it’s appropriate to post something FABULOUS!
So I bring you (in the typical spirit of Myrtle)….The History of Daryl Hall’s [...]

Morrissey Mondays

So the rumor online is that Morrissey is wearing dentures.

I guess he’s been lisping (but is it a Lucky Lisp), and I guess his mouth and chin look different. I haven’t really noticed, because to me, he looks like a whiny 50 year old man.

Snippets, Part 367

Myrtle likes herself some fancy root beer.
I usually get the Dog’s N’ Suds (my favorite), but I thought I’d try out a different one to see if it could kick The Pup’s ass.
So in this fight we have the returning champion, Dog’s N’ Suds, versus Berghoff.

Vampires (and Myrtle) suck!

So I’ve been totally bummed lately.
I have a subscription to Entertainment Weekly because I’m totally weak ass and the newest issue is the “Vampire” issue.
Bah humbug!

Myrtle has the eye of the tiger

Myrtle’s on a mission.
A girl with a gun.
I got a picture in my pocket of the lucky one.
Ok, enough with the Devo.
As some of you know, I’ve been dieting and working out since last June. I was taking diet pills (a.k.a. clean speed), and I stopped taking those back in October. They actually worked, and [...]

I have the transcripts right here…..

 

 
So Myrtle gets to add another checkmark to the “Creamy Panties” List.

A Typical Morning for Myrtle

Myrtle is usually one of those people that is always on time, and I hate it when other people are late (and NO, I am not talking about you, Jayson). I understand that shit happens and everyone is late on occasion, but I’m talking about people who are constantly, habitually late.
Myrtle is becoming one of [...]

Myrtle tries to reflect on something from her past

The first and last thing I saw when I came and went from my apartment was “909″ on the door in those cheap shitty brass letters.
I thought I had finally gotten away from that number.

Just for you – here’s a love song!

So back around Valentines Day, Mr. Canacorn (or what I like to call him – Mr. Candy Corn) wrote a sweet blog about his old lady and “their” songs. If Myrtle didn’t have a black heart, she would have been “touched”.
I dont think I’ve ever had a “song” with a boyfriend (or trick ass ho’). [...]

‘Sup!

My little brother Jeffrey called me the other day and he was telling me about how he got moved to all regular classes at school, and he was describing his new teachers to me. He’s been obsessed with “what kind of music” people like, and it worries me because I dont want him to end [...]