Just because…..

….I miss my Goob

Vampires (and Myrtle) suck!

So I’ve been totally bummed lately.
I have a subscription to Entertainment Weekly because I’m totally weak ass and the newest issue is the “Vampire” issue.
Bah humbug!

If I could have one memory….

Someone asked me one time “If I could only have one memory, what would it be?”

It was a good question, and I was surprised when it entered my mind pretty instantly. I thought it would be something I would have to think and think about, and usually my natural blonde head HATES thinking after [...]

Yo’ Mamma’s Day

It sucks having a dead mom on Mother’s Day.
Not because you’re mom is dead, but because people wont stop bugging the fuck out of you…..

Myrtle’s pussy is an asshole…..

ARGH!
Fat Goo has been a fat asshole lately.

Myrtle expresses herself through Art Therapy

Myrtle has been stressed lately.
My weight-loss has me stressed.
My love-life (or lack of it) has me stressed.
My fear of being alone for the rest of my life has me stressed.
My car has me stressed.
The fact that Bo is going to die from pancreatic cancer on “Days of our Lives” has me stressed.
And, of course, [...]

I have the transcripts right here…..

 

 
So Myrtle gets to add another checkmark to the “Creamy Panties” List.

A Typical Morning for Myrtle

Myrtle is usually one of those people that is always on time, and I hate it when other people are late (and NO, I am not talking about you, Jayson). I understand that shit happens and everyone is late on occasion, but I’m talking about people who are constantly, habitually late.
Myrtle is becoming one of [...]

Just for you – here’s a love song!

So back around Valentines Day, Mr. Canacorn (or what I like to call him – Mr. Candy Corn) wrote a sweet blog about his old lady and “their” songs. If Myrtle didn’t have a black heart, she would have been “touched”.
I dont think I’ve ever had a “song” with a boyfriend (or trick ass ho’). [...]

Eat Fresh! (Obviously I dont mean your mom)

So Norco has a Subway.
Myrtle was glad when it opened up. It was close, and it was in the same shopping center as Staters and the loogie laundermat, so it was convenient. But seriously, it’s a fucking joke.